... I stumbled upon you and gratefully basked in your rays.
While basking I took a bit of a hiatus from writing. Much needed. Looking back on the spring, I realized that I needed time to repair a hurting heart. I was in love with an idea of a happily ever after that wasn't obtainable because it wasn't built on a foundation that God had laid. Hence, why the garden I planted didn't flourish with daisies. The outcome, was as predicted: unspoken words and distance. Lots of distance. And though we are still friends, the feelings dicipated as morning dew does. I'm grateful for the unknown. I'm glad for the leap I did not take because God was still molding and repairing my heart while I was trying to give it away. I was throwing my pearls to the pigs. I'm still a very young Christian. Even in the 5 months, since my infatuation, I have matured greatly and in that time the Lord has shown me so much. It's always fun looking back at the lessons He teaches us, especially when we obediently follow Him even when we don't want to. I'm glad He has taught me obedience because through that obedience I was spared a heartache.
Sometimes following Christ is hard and we think we know what's best for us... but we don't. So my thoughts for today are gratitude for this "me" time. I have really grown as a Christian, a woman, a mother and a friend. I'm almost certain God wanted me to be with only Him while He reconstructed and repaired my heart. When He is finished I have a feeling He will make it clear by bringing that perfect companion into my life. Till then God is preparing me for an even more beautiful life and I'm so excited to see what's next. Until "next" I'm just going to sit back and listen to what God has to say, do what He tells me to do, and enjoy the ride to the land of milk & honey.
